Holding You
by shezlarr
Summary: His hands slithered down to Scorpius' waist, bracing his hips, whilst Scorpius' large, thin hands cupped both sides of his suddenly warm face.


_Please enjoy & let me know what you think_ ^_^

Holding You

Albus smiled contently, completely blissful and calm in the strong arms of a Gryffindor, who radiated heat like the sun. The breath from the other tickled Albus' neck and cheek very slightly as their tousled blonde head lay buried on his shoulder whilst he in their arms, their limbs tangled round each other.

Fully clothed, no worries...Well, _kind_ of.

"That...was amazing." a voice spoke breathlessly into his ear, soft, happy. He was happy. He traced a skeletal finger down the front of the shirt he was hugged against.

He secretly smiled again, blushing like a lovelorn girl. "Yeah, it was." he managed to reply, surprising himself when he heard the honesty - and own delighted shock in his own voice.

They were curled up in the second, spare living room in Albus Potter's house he lived in with the rest of his family, and always had. It wasn't quite a mansion, but it was large and vast, though not very grand. More homey and comfortable and complete, the way the Potters' liked it.

They lived on the outskirts of Godric's Hollow, more surrounded by muggle families than magical. But never had a day gone by that Albus had never crossed paths with witches and wizards in the neighbourhood, as there was plenty of them, living harmoniously with non-magical families. Of course, he wouldn't be entwined on a settee like this if his parents or his brother was home; Lily was upstairs in her room, talking nine-to-the-dozen down the muggle phone to a muggle girl that lived right across the bloody street, and his parents were over at Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron's. He didn't know where James was, perhaps getting intoxicated with muggle boys in the same street, some maybe even magical. He didn't really care.

What he did care about was the love of his life whom he was laying in the arms of. If he flicked his wrist, he would have undone the buttons he had helped re-button minutes previous. _It could happen all over again_, he thought with a heated joy rising inside him. But when he looked at the beautiful man beside him, how his chest rose and fell, recovering, he couldn't. Not yet, anyway.

There was an excited giggle and squeal of laughter from above, which made both boys jump before relaxing. Sharing furtive glances, both boys' faces beamed a wide grin.

"She'll be the death of your parents," Scorpius chuckled as he rose his head from Albus's shoulder slightly, looking him in the eye.

"And of me, remember? She's still hyped she has a gay brother to go shopping with." Albus snickered, cheerfully, but he was down. All he wanted was to think of Scorpius, be with him, talk to him, about him, them. But his mum and dad – more their mum – had suggested Lily stay home with him and Scorpius on the blonde's now routine visit. Albus knew exactly what his mother was trying to prevent happening whilst the boys were in the house together by placing Lily in their care; she didn't need baby-sitting, she was almost fifteen! It was so painfully obvious, but he was thankful his sister was oblivious. Lily never had disturbed them or walked in; she didn't even know.

_So_ little his mum knew.

Al raised his head after staring at the buttons on Scorpius' half-buttoned shirt for minutes as he contemplated such thoughts, and met Scorpius's stilling gaze with ease. "C'mon, Scorp. You can't keep pretending. Denying. We've done this, and that. Please," his voice hinted at a secret anguish that chilled his bones against the warmth of Scorpius' body.

Even though the problems, the turmoil, the tears, the muddled thoughts - it had all blown over, was gone, in the past; Al saw Scorpius accepted who he was, and what he was.

Just not what they _did_.

Scorpius's face fell slightly, and he looked away out the window as he spoke. "I'm sorry, Al. It just – just takes –"

"-Time." Albus finished for him coldly. "I know." his joyful reserve had dissolved, but still looking on Scorpius' face, brought a smile to his own that reminded him why he continued to fight. For this, for them.

Unwinding his arms and legs from his boyfriend like a pro, he sat up, forearms rested against his knees. His black hair had been cropped, but it grew back with a vengeance. His fringe was a mess. Scorpius' blonde hair was like a jungle where Albus had ruffled it, played with it, and as he had done so, laughed.

Such a recent memory made him soften so he wasn't cold, and he didn't push Scorpius' hand from his shoulder when it was placed there.

"Al-"

He cut Scorpius off with a finger to the lips, reaching behind him, knowing exactly the place the blonde's sweet mouth would be.

"I'm sorry, Scorp." Albus sighed, regretting getting in a huff over such a trivial thing – what did it matter if Scorpius still felt flecks of discomfort about what they did? It would just take time, and he needed to be patient and understanding, not stressing over it.

Yet, Albus believed it _did_ matter: it was like Scorpius was only half-in with their relationship; he accepted he loved Albus, Al knew, but with a sudden Thump, he realised he had never heard Scorpius, who was looking at him half-weary, half sheepish, confess to being gay. Never. They'd just…got on. Scorpius had told him countless times how much he loved him; but was he still not ready come out, full-on? He didn't mind they kiss – except when Mr Draco Malfoy was anywhere near – and Albus had never doubted Scorpius had his head and heart in them. But maybe…

Maybe it was true Scorpius loved him. _That was the heart part, Which is all that should matter,_ Albus tried to console himself as he returned a small smile to Scorpius' calm yet anxious face. But what about his head? Did Scorpius really, honestly grasp the reality of their relationship? Two boys in love and together. He didn't think this was some boyhood crush or phase and was going on with it just to…experience? Know? Get the feel of it and if he didn't like it, move on?

Dread welled up in the raven-haired boy, but he shoved it away; no, he shouldn't be doubting Scorpius, he should be trusting him!

He turned back to the handsome blonde, whose shirt was still only half-way done up. And Albus' jeans were discarded somewhere, left in his green and grey Quidditch boxers and his normal black t-shirt. He reached over and wrapped Scorpius in a hug, not knowing if it was to reassure Scorpius he wasn't mad at him, or himself that Scorpius was in this the whole way.

"We're okay, Al, aren't we?" the blonde asked quietly as he gently stroked his fingers down the fabric on Albus' chest. Albus pressed a kiss to his boyfriend's head, which made Scorpius look up at him, slightly pulled away. Albus opened his mouth to ask _'What now?'_ when his lips were captured, firmly and then altogether lost trying to get round the other. His hands slithered down to Scorpius' waist, bracing his hips, whilst Scorpius' large, thin hands cupped both sides of his suddenly warm face.

Scorpius' shirt was undone and all but shorn off in their tumble, Albus' head pressed against the arm of the settee; he had to reach up to tackle Scorpius' lips, who stretched over him, grinning wickedly.

"You're an asshole." Albus mumbled, half groaning, when Scorpius' lips left his to butterfly-kiss his jaw, his throat…

"And you're on the bottom." was the blonde's witty, challenging smirk in return; almost identical to his own father's. But Albus didn't think about that.

They wrestled and groped, but the Potter boy remained solidly underneath his boyfriend, on the bottom of the pair, and eventually collapsed, panting for breath as Scorpius drew his own breath, still wavering over him, his bright hair clashing with the blackness that was Albus' hair. Al's hands crept to Scorpius' belt, the clink of the metal making Scorpius focus on Al's intentions.

"No, not again, not _here_!" he didn't need to indicate to the settee they were sprawled over.

"_Spoil-sport_." Albus whispered in his ear, as daring as a Slytherin could be, his hands automatically slipping the belt from the buckle.

The door banged open with a sharp, loud **CLUMP** as it hit off the wall. The boys froze, completely forgetting how compromised the position they was in, was. A tall, broad figure hovered in the doorway, looking just as dumbstruck yet expressionless as Albus felt, who had to crane his neck to see who it was; but the expression, or lack of, on Scorpius' face told him everything, and for a split-second he closed his eyes, praying it away, but when he opened them he was still being straddled by his boyfriend.

"_James_?" Albus asked foolishly, but then, realisation striking him ten-fold, it became startled. "James!"

Scorpius leapt off of him like lightening, too late really. He hastily did his belt up but that was also too late. Albus stood up off the settee, saw the gears in James' head ticking, knowing what he had almost walked in on…For a moment James looked violently sick, shuddering on the spot, and Albus moved forward a step – James shot back as if he'd been hexed, and stared at his younger brother. A bare second of fury reflected in his eyes made Albus wished he had missed it, and he was sure Scorpius saw too. The guilt must have been painted in blistering red across their faces, as Scorpius' hands remained holding his belt, fiddling with the end that wouldn't tuck in.

"Hi Scorpius, alright mate?" the last word was so obviously forced it made Albus drop his eyes. He knew Scorpius heard it too, and Al just let himself fall back to sit on the edge of the settee, elbows on his knees.

"Yeah, thanks. How are you?" Scorpius' polite reply sounded as normal as it could be in this situation, and Al also knew Scorp had on his smile that was gentlemanly; apologetic to his own Quidditch Captain.

James just stood there, stiff as a board, and nodded. "Good." he all but choked out, and he left the room, swinging the door shut behind him. It was then Albus noticed James' muggle phone lying innocently on the coffee table, which he had come to get, and wouldn't, now they had almost…

Albus was bewildered and sad; _How could things just change like that?_ One moment him and Scorpius are in the process of…yeah…and the next James is at the door, horrified. Al's head fell into his hands and he sighed so heavily it nearly took him out.

James had never, ever gotten over the fact his little brother brought a man – a boy – home for dinner, to sleep over – barely to sleep _with_, except on rare occasions like this – to be accepted by his family, and Scorpius wasn't; not by James or his mum, not completely, though Al knew she tried her hardest. Harry had just been more or less a ghost the past few months, neither accepting or rejecting. He still chatted away to Scorpius about Quidditch and how Gryffindor's chances was looking - but enter Albus, and he saw there was a measure of control being slowly unwound like dynamite. Al could only guess him and Scorpius being so close in the same room as his father reminded Harry of his and Scorpius' scene in McGonagall's office all that time ago. Al could see the patience, the understanding, straining only slightly in his father when Scorpius came for dinner and they were all sat round the table. Besides, Scorpius was a Malfoy. And though Harry had told him he held no grudges, Al still suspected that that wasn't the whole truth – a Malfoy was a Malfoy, and Al couldn't deny the times he had seen Scorpius, who hated his father more than anyone, reflect that man so much in angry, hateful moments between the two of them.

"Merlin." a voice to his left cut the air. He heard the rustle of material and wondered if Scorpius had the _utter_ stupidity and guts to be getting undressed – _oh_, how he wanted him to – but no. When he raised his head, Scorpius was fully-clothed, buckled and buttoned like a vicar, his hair somewhat more composed. Albus' heartbeat was still in his mouth.

"That was…close." Scorpius muttered unhelpfully. Al flicked his smouldering green eyes to check Scorpius' grey. A guilty chuckle exited Albus, sounding maniacal.

"Merlin, Scorp. It was cutting it closer than that." he shot Scorpius a sceptical look, incredulous. He saw what Scorpius was trying to do; make it laughable, a joke, a silly… anything. And it wasn't, it was serious. _They_ were serious. _He_ was serious. Al's mood was so dark it couldn't be suppressed by the lovingly confused look on Scorp's face.

"Don't, Scorp, really…don't." he warned as Scorpius opened his mouth. Now Scorp just looked plain offended. "Look-" he tried calmly.

"-No, _you_ look, Albus!" Scorpius snapped, actually shutting him up. Al's eyes glowered, but he stayed silent. "That was…its fine. Nothing. It could've been worse-"

Albus threw himself to his feet and exploded. "Worse? _Worse?_ Scorpius, my brother walked in on us as we was in the process of almost having sex!" he thundered, and he saw the horror and startled spark in Scorpius' eyes. Al knew he was exaggerating a little bit, but he couldn't care less. "Yes, Scorp, _sex_, because that's what we do! This is bad enough besides actually being caught in the act-" Albus choked on his words as they rationalised him.

If James was only a minute later…oh Merlin, he didn't want to think how _that_ would have ended, he would never be able to stand it. To him…it was love. But through James' eyes – and anyone else's that wasn't himself, even Scorpius – it was abnormal. It was sick. And these thoughts were scratched straight across Scorpius' pale face, which was tinged a very light red with the confrontation, the yelling Albus was executing. He saw the terror in his boyfriend's eyes, and hated it.

The air felt hot like a spark between them, not quite a flaming fire. Albus hung on the spot like a puppet, just stood there as he lowered his eyes, knowing now Scorpius, even when they…Scorpius couldn't accept it. Al just turned on the spot, the past feelings of feeling trapped and over-whelmed beginning to prowl round him.

"Please, Al!" Scorpius' cry made him jump, and Albus spun round; it wasn't often the Gryffindor's voice sounded so lost, so agonised. "Don't be mad. I'm trying. Of course…_that_…didn't help…"Scorpius' tone made the Slytherin raise his eyes to meet the other boy's. "But remember, I love you." the pain on his face as he said it made Albus want to rush to him and throw his arms round the blonde's strong shoulders, but he didn't.

Albus smiled, and reached out to brushthe tips of his fingers against Scorpius' hand for a fraction of a second, then left the room before Scorpius could see how wound up and close to tears he was.

"Where are you-?"

"-Trousers." Albus told him shortly, opening the door and disappearing down the hall in a flurry, praying Lily didn't wonder downstairs and see him…she'd guess straight away.

When he entered his room, the first thing he hit was the wall which tore pain through his whole arm where his fist connected. He raged round his room, upturning a lamp, sweeping parchment and stationary off his desk as if it wasn't there, kicking his desk chair so it sailed across the room and hit off the door with a loud BANG. A moment later it flew open and James burst in, a storm blazing in his eyes, his face, how he held himself; all of it bellowed FURY. He looked like he wanted to _crucify_ Albus.

Sometimes, the brothers forgot they were wizards.

Before Al barely registered who was in his room, James had crossed the space separating them and a hand shoved him hard in the chest, hard enough to bruise. Albus stumbled backwards so his calves hit the end of his bed. The surprise and anger bubbled up in Al like a cauldron; it was lucky he wasn't armed with his wand.

"NEVER!" James roared, deafening Al they were so close, his expression one of contempt disgust. "I never want to witness _anything_ like that again, got it? If you want to be bumboys, then do it in this room and no ruddy-where else!" another shove sent Albus flailing onto his bed. "And fix your room before mum gets back, Merlin knows she'll guess what you and he have been up to." James hissed darkly, and as quickly as he came, turned to move to the door.

Albus was up like a flash, defiance and…something else…braving him against his brother.

"Just stop it, James, just quit it! I don't _care_ what you want or don't want! What me and Scorpius do, wherever, is _our_ business! It's not your place to say what we do and where!" Al snarled, his eyes searing into James'; all the hurt and anger blew out of him, all the anguish over Scorpius, of his mum, James, some of his friends, family, Rose…How they all _pretended_ to accept but didn't, didn't, DIDN'T. It wasn't fair. _Am I the only honest wizard left?_

James faced his younger brother and scoped a glare over him that was murderous, even as he watched Al tremble from head to foot. "That's a load of absolute shite, Al, and you know it! I mean, Lily's home, you make me _sick_, you can't bum each other anywhere you please,-"

"STOP IT!" Albus screamed, silencing James like the grave. Tears prickled at the corner of his eyes but he refused to let them trickle. A gap the size of infinity stretched between the brothers.

After a minute or so, James' stiffness was still there, but his eyes had softened the minutest bit, it was barely countable. "Not again." was all James said, and then he was gone, slamming Al's bedroom door behind him.

It took a few minutes or so, for Albus to register it all, but the tears leaked; he slapped them away furiously but as they fell faster and harder it became impossible so he stopped fighting. He let them wash over his face like a black waterfall, darkening him like a curse. He felt himself crumble onto his bed, but continued to slip until he was on the floor, hugging himself and then his nails clutching at the tops of his arms, keeping himself together in fear his body, bones, blood, would break and pour out if he let go, unwound. _I just want everything to fold into place and be okay,_ he thought sorrowfully. He had been so happy, they. He had silently witnessed Scorpius' confusion every time they saw each other, watched his boyfriend struggle with himself, them. Al, he had done nothing, just go on, not dealt with the issues from the beginning, left them to gnaw away at the pieces that weren't perfect, unsolved and unsettled. He had blocked them out for the sake of keeping Scorpius, but now he knew, for as long as he ignored the fact Scorpius was stumbling over himself with what he was and who they were, nothing was going to move forward, let alone become happier. _Things have to be settled._

"Al? Albus? Don't tell me you've got lost inside your trousers-" Scorpius, on cue, entered quietly, and Al was there to meet him, fully-clothed and grinning, his room somewhat compiled and orderly. Al watchted as the Malfoy swept a glance over the room, over him, and silently swallowed his sobs. He swung a arm round the blonde's shoulders and placed a small kiss on his lips. He ignored the curious, concerned look Scorpius wore.

"I'm famished, Scorp. Let's see what I can whip up." Al led the way out of his bedroom, smirking as he wondered what to eat. "Any preferences, Mr Malfoy?"

Scorpius threw him a knowing smirk in return. "I'm more of a sausage guy, to be honest." he winked.

**_The End._**


End file.
